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Author Topic: Introducing myself  (Read 3670 times)
LaniB12
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« on: October 03, 2007, 06:40:16 AM »
Hi,  I am Lani.  My father in law is on dialysis having suffered from kidney failure and has been doing dialysis for the past year. Please forgive me for not remembering the correct medical term but he is on the one where he has a catheter in his abdomen and the fluid is inserted.  No machines are used.  He is also blind and had one leg amputated about 9 months ago and lost the other about a week ago.

My husband and I take care of him as best we can, unfortunately he is now confined to a nursing home.  We helped keep his as independent for as long as possible, doing his shopping etc but as he has worsened he has now had to go to a nursing home.    We'd like to have him in better care in or in a home care situation unfortunately his daughter has taken off with all his money so we are trying to make things as best as possible.  The other difficulty we face is that his wife who he adores (they've been separated for about 15 years) and his daughter (who has always been his favorite) do not like me and have now caused major problems for my husband and I.  I cannot visit my father in law, he does not like me and does not want to know about my child, his granddaughter.  It makes it a little difficult as I cannot discuss his condition with medical staff and my husband doesn't really like talking to medical staff, he's the quiet type.

I've come to seek answers to questions, gain some insight and hopefully make some friends.

Lani
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boxman55
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« Reply #1 on: October 03, 2007, 06:57:59 AM »
Welcome Lani, please ask all you want. There are alot of well informed people on this website that are willing to assist...Boxman
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"Be the change you wished to be"
Started Hemodialysis 8/14/06
Lost lower right leg 5/16/08 due to Diabetes
Sister was denied donation to me for medical reasons 1/2008
Romona
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« Reply #2 on: October 03, 2007, 09:18:16 AM »
I think you did a great job trying to take care of him.  :welcomesign;
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paris
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« Reply #3 on: October 03, 2007, 10:00:36 AM »
 :welcomesign; Each of us can only do our best and it seems like you did everything you could.  Glad you found us. Hope we can give you help and support.
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It's not what you gather, but what you scatter that tells what kind of life you have lived.
paddbear0000
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Dogs & IHDer's are always glad to see you!

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« Reply #4 on: October 03, 2007, 11:04:36 AM »
 :welcomesign;  I'm sorry to hear about your situation and your father-in-law's. I'm sure you are very frustrated. I was in a similar situation with my father and his boss/care-taker (that's a whole other story) before he died, so I know where you're coming from. Please feel free to vent all you want. That's what we're here for! Good luck!   :grouphug;
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I HAVE DESIGNED CKD RELATED PRODUCTS FOR SALE TO BENEFIT THE NKF'S 2009 DAYTON KIDNEY WALK (I'M A TEAM CAPTAIN)! CHECK IT OUT @ www.cafepress.com/RetroDogDesigns!!

...or sponsor me at http://walk.kidney.org/goto/janetschnittger
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Twitter.com/NKFKidneyWalker
www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1659267443&ref=nf 
www.caringbridge.org/visit/janetschnittger

Diagnosed type 1 diabetic at age 6, CKD (stage 3) diagnosed at 28 after hospital error a year before, started dialysis February '09. Listed for kidney/pancreas transplant at Ohio State & Univ. of Cincinnati.
angela515
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i am awesome.
« Reply #5 on: October 03, 2007, 11:59:40 AM »
 :welcomesign; and it sounds like your a wonderful caretaker! Glad to have you join the site and I am sure your answers will be answered or tried to be answered as best as possible. This a great site and a wonderful caring support group.  :grouphug;
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Live Donor Transplant From My Mom 12/14/1999
Perfect Match (6 of 6) Cadaver Transplant On 1/14/2007
Sluff
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« Reply #6 on: October 03, 2007, 01:56:26 PM »
Welcome to IHD Lani,

You will find lots of information amongst the over 75000 posts. I think it is important for you to be informed and it is great that you are trying to be a great caregiver. We are like family here also so you will make lots of new friends.

If you have any questions just ask and we will do our best to help. Feel free to post as often as you like.

Sluff/ Admin
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Hawkeye
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« Reply #7 on: October 03, 2007, 02:33:10 PM »
Hello and  :welcomesign;
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It's not easy being green.
Joe Paul
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« Reply #8 on: October 03, 2007, 03:06:26 PM »
Welcome Lani, good to have you aboard.
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"The history of discovery is completed by those who don't follow rules"
Angels are with us, but don't take GOD for granted
Transplant Jan. 8, 2010
Laurie
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May 13, 2008
« Reply #9 on: October 03, 2007, 03:10:03 PM »
 :welcomesign;
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March 7, 2001 - Complications after C-section caused kidney failure
March 2001 - December 2001 - Hemo Dialysis
December 2001 - Kidney function improved dialysis no longer necessary
October 2006 - Kidney function started to decline
May 9, 2007 - Listed at Baylor Dallas and Fort Worth
October 12, 2007 - Started PD
May 13, 2008 - Kidney Transplant from a deceased donor
Bajanne
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Goofynina and Epoman - Gone But Not Forgotten

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« Reply #10 on: October 03, 2007, 07:56:30 PM »
Welcome to our community.  I really admire you for seeking information, given the situation you are in. That is commendable.  This is just the place to come.  There is lots to read, and you can also ask questions in the appropriate sections.  This is also a caring and supportive place when you just want to vent.  Here is a group hug from all of us. :grouphug;


Bajanne, Moderator
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"To be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own ...but that which is based on faith"



I LOVE  my IHD family! :grouphug;
keefer51
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« Reply #11 on: October 04, 2007, 12:52:03 AM »
 :welcomesign;
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i am a 51 year old male on dialysis for 3 years now. This is my second time. My brother donated a kidney to me about 13 years ago. I found this site on another site. I had to laugh when i saw what it was called. I hope to meet people from all over to talk about dialysis.
angellady07
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« Reply #12 on: October 04, 2007, 04:19:31 PM »
Welcome Lani.
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Redbomb
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« Reply #13 on: October 04, 2007, 04:39:04 PM »
 :welcomesign;

Glad that you found us!
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okarol
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Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

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« Reply #14 on: October 04, 2007, 04:45:12 PM »
 :waving; Hi Lani,
Family situations are sometimes difficult, but throw in some illness and it really gets challenging. I hope you can work something out - hang in there!

 :welcomesign;
okarol/moderator
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
MyssAnne
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« Reply #15 on: October 05, 2007, 10:44:16 AM »
Welcome, Lani! You are in a difficult posiition, aren't you? Your FIL is really having a difficult time of it too with HIS family. We commend you for trying with him! Just do what you can, sometimes that's all you can do.
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goofynina
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He is the love of my life......
« Reply #16 on: October 05, 2007, 05:08:11 PM »
Hey LaniB12,  Welcome to ihatedialysis.com.  I think it is great that you show such interest in your father-in-laws illness, thank you  :2thumbsup;  I am sorry for all the strife you are getting from your other in-laws though, dont they realize what you are doing for this man?  That is too bad and shame on them.  Good luck to you and your Father-in-law.  You have come to the right place to get answers.  We look forward to hearing more from you...  :2thumbsup;


Goofynina/Admin.
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....and i think to myself, what a wonderful world....

www.kidneyoogle.com
kitkatz
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« Reply #17 on: October 07, 2007, 03:30:08 PM »
Welcome to the site!  It is a long haul for the people who care for elderly parents or relatives.  I wish you luck in dealing with the situation.



kitkatz,moderator
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
LaniB12
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« Reply #18 on: October 19, 2007, 04:50:04 AM »
Thank you for the very warm welcome.  Sorry it's been a while since I've been back on the boards, but I back and ready to start investigating and asking questions.

 :thx;
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KR Cincy
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Home hemodialysis since May 07
« Reply #19 on: October 19, 2007, 08:28:48 AM »
 :welcomesign;
and best of luck...
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Not giving up...thanks to Susan.
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