I''m Going Crazy(er)

[Charlie B53]

I woke up, again, as I rarely sleep more than 2 hours at a time.  Check the clock, 2:04 a.m..  Not unusual.

I am about to turn to my side and go back to sleep when I clearly hear my Wife call my name, in a distressed voice, from the living room.

I have a problem with this as I know Patsy is 100 miles away in the Nursing Home, Terminal on Hospice. A year already just Monday of this week.

But I GOT TO get up and go look, cause I HEARD her, and this isn't the first time.

Of course she wasn't there, so I get my phone and call the Night Nurse.  Denise tells me matter of fact that she was in Patsy's room just 4 minutes ago and she is awake and the two Hall Attendant Ladies are with her now.

I told her why I called, that I am simply going crazy(er) but Please tell Patsy that I will be there in another 12 hours to spend the week end with her.

Nurse Denise assured me they would take great care of her until I get there.

No way I'm going back to sleep now. So I've already made my cup of coffee.

[Kathymac2]

I don't think you are going crazy(er) Charlie. I think you are a good man who is trying to take care of his sick wife from 100 miles away and finding it unbelievably difficult.

My heart goes out to you. Terminal illness is something we all face if we don't die of something else first. I almost think it's harder in many ways on the loved ones rather than "the patient". 

Patsy is so lucky to have you. I hope you have a good weekend with your wife and that you can relax a bit being by her side.

[Alexysis]

I woke up, again, as I rarely sleep more than 2 hours at a time.  Check the clock, 2:04 a.m..  Not unusual.

I am about to turn to my side and go back to sleep when I clearly hear my Wife call my name, in a distressed voice, from the living room.

I have a problem with this as I know Patsy is 100 miles away in the Nursing Home, Terminal on Hospice. A year already just Monday of this week.

But I GOT TO get up and go look, cause I HEARD her, and this isn't the first time.

Of course she wasn't there, so I get my phone and call the Night Nurse.  Denise tells me matter of fact that she was in Patsy's room just 4 minutes ago and she is awake and the two Hall Attendant Ladies are with her now.

I told her why I called, that I am simply going crazy(er) but Please tell Patsy that I will be there in another 12 hours to spend the week end with her.

Nurse Denise assured me they would take great care of her until I get there.

No way I'm going back to sleep now. So I've already made my cup of coffee.

Stranger things have happened. Last October, my dad was in hospice care, and was slipping fast. I stopped to see him before dialysis, and he was sleeping, so I didn't wake him.

After dialysis, I called the nurse and she told me he was sleeping soundly. I had dinner, watched a little TV, then went to sleep. Woke up about 2 with a headache, and had dreamed that my dad was calling my name. I got up, took an aspirin, and just as I got back in bed the phone rang. It was the hospice nurse, informing me that my father had just passed away. I can't remember the last time I'd dreamed of my father, and haven't done so since.

Now, I'm not a person who believes in the supernatural, but that experience left me believing that there may be ways of communicating that we can't even comprehend. 

[cassandra]

First of all Charlie and Alexis I wish you both strength and love with the situations you find yourselves in. And I believe very much in the strong connection between people on a different level which is not physically tangible, and we don’t learn, or no much about.


Love and strength, Cas

[kitkatz]

All I can do is tell you these things happen.  Mysterious things come upon us when we least expect it.  Try to get some sleep. You are not crazy.