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Author Topic: My Wife Wants to Bail on Me!  (Read 7332 times)
rocker
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« Reply #25 on: April 07, 2012, 09:53:05 PM »

I can only speak for me, but I was utterly terrified at the thought of traveling with NxStage.  We managed to avoid it for months, but there came a time when it simply had to be done.  I was a complete wreck, even though by then we were old pros.

But I sucked it up, and we did it.  I was literally shaking hooking him up.  (He kinda laughed at me.)  The next night...well, it wasn't quite so bad.  We've had five or six trips since then and now really the thing I am most apprehensive of is moving the damn machine. We're small, and it's heavy.

Someone mentioned embarrassment, and I admit that I am a little embarrassed.  I generally just put the "Do not disturb" sign on the door so the maids won't come and if there's anything I need for towels or toiletries, I ask the front desk. I take the trash and boxes out myself.

Another problem I had is that we only travel on business.  I like to do a bit of sightseeing when I'm doing business travel.  But when we were doing short daily, a dialysis day meant getting up in the morning, going to work, rushing back to the hotel, setting up the machine, running out to get groceries or takeout, then rushing back to the room to get hooked up.  When the treatment was done, sleep immediately.  Now that we're doing "extended at night", we don't have to hook up until bedtime and so have our evenings free.

I do have a suggestion.  No idea if this will help.  But ask if she'd be willing to try a fakeation.  Choose a different room in the house to do dialysis.  Pack your supplies, dialysate, and the machine.  Put everything in the car.  Then say "Ok, we're leaving."  Maybe drive around the block.  Then come back to the house, and carry the luggage into the other room as if it were a hotel room. Make a rule that you don't leave the room unless something goes wrong.  Do the whole treatment without leaving the room. 

I think this would have helped me a lot, but I didn't think of it then.  :)  Yes, it's a lot of trouble.  But it will help her realize that it can be done, I think.

One other thing I do to reassure myself is to look up the closest home dialysis center to our destination - just so I know there's a place we can go if we need supplies or help.

Hope this helps.

  - rocker
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brandywine
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« Reply #26 on: April 09, 2012, 11:41:23 AM »

Moosemom-You give the best advice!

Genlando-I'm so glad that you finally sat down and talked to your wife. Hopefully, a few more of those open and understanding conversations will send you in the right direction. When you are in the moment, I know it feels overwhelming, like you can't take it another day. I'm glad that you hung in there.

Keep us posted!
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IgA Nephropathy Diagnosed Feb 2009
Transplant List Nov 2010
Peritoneal Dialysis Dec 2010
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