Trying to face my fear

[needlephobic]

I suspect that if she really thought she'd get into trouble or would lose her job just because she agreed to sit with you, she wouldn't have offered in the first place.

MM I asked her to set with me and like I said everybody that tried to help me there are no longer working there. I just hope they don't get rid of her.

That's great! You've been making such strides already, who knows what you'll be able to face after 2 weeks.

Yes I am making small strides. For my IHD family that don't understand of what it is being afraid of needles. What I am doing is very hard for me. Some people might think setting with a D needle next to me is stupid but my fear of them is controlling me and I freak out at the sight of a needle. I have avoided needles and Doctors all my life. If I don't have somebody with me when the needle is placed I will freak out and hurt myself trying to get out of that chair. Just need somebody to talk to me and calm me down and let me get used to it setting next to me. Its called baby steps and takes time. Thanks for all the support I really need it . Sorry if I offended anybody.

[CebuShan]

To be honest, I always thought I had a phobia for needles until I met you. Now I realise it was just dislike. I've always been able to convince myself that I needed it & dealt with it. My true phobia would be spiders. I don't care how small, I panic. My husband has to come rescue me if I'm in a room and the spider is between me & the door. I'll cry & get sick to my stomach if I have to wait but I can't move past it. I do know the source of my fear, I was bitten when I was in high school & had a severe reaction (still have the scars). My husband & I are a perfect match because he has a similar phobia to snakes & lizards. They don't bother me at all. I do kind of understand your fear & really admire your strength in letting them set one beside you and even handling a needle! I know, at this point, I could NOT do the same with a spider. I don't think you have offended anyone, but if you have, so what? Nobody is forced to read or comment on your posts! Hang in there, you are stronger than you are giving yourself credit.

[billybags]

Aye Needle the baby steps are good. you are trying your best, keep up the good work.

[Whamo]

I am new to dialysis, and I still use a catheter.  I dread the day I get a fistula because I hate the sight of needles.  I always look away when they poke me.  I see my vascular surgeon soon so I guess I will have to get used to it.  I wish you luck in overcoming your fear.

[carson]

I have been on dialysis for 14 yrs. First it was PD, because I'm absolutely afraid of needles. Can't even watch them on TV or in a movie because I'll panic. For the last 4 yrs I've been on nocturnal home hemo and I have a catheter. I had one infection a couple years ago and my nurse went all "fistula" on me. Man, did I ever freak out!! I still don't have one and I've not had another infection, touch wood! I hate the thought of needles, especially doing it at home myself. An IHD friend told me it's better to do it yourself because you have control and know how you want it done. I can't even look when they take blood so how am I supposed to self cannulate?  I have been thinking about trying hypnosis. It worked for my jealousy (which I will tell you was ruining and ruling my life!!) so maybe it can work for my phobia.

I feel for you, Needlephobic!! You're doing WAY better than me! You will be the one who inspires me!! Thank you!

[willowtreewren]

Needleman!

OMG! you have come so very far! This is fantastic! You are absolutely going to be able to do this!

Congratulations!

 

Aleta

[Stacy Without An E]

I've been on Dialysis for over 7 years and I still have a phobia related to needles, so I understand what you're going through.  Every time I have someone who is new to the clinic hook me up, I start sweating profusely.  I've had so many traumatic moments over the years with inadequate needle insertion.  So every time someone new approaches me, all those horrible memories step out of the shadows in my psyche and cause me to become agitated.

I could be on Dialysis the remainder of my life & I'll probably never cure myself of these personal issues.