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Author Topic: medical dictionary  (Read 1960 times)
Marina
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God Bless my donor family!! :)

« on: October 27, 2010, 10:48:51 AM »

Artery -The study of paintings.
Bacteria - Back door to cafeteria.
Barium - What doctors do when patients die.
Benign - What you be, after you be eight.
Caesarean Section - A neighborhood in Rome.
Cat scan - Searching for Kitty.
Cauterize - Made eye contact with her.
Colic - A sheep dog.
Coma - A punctuation mark.
Dilate - To live long.
Enema - Not a friend.
Fester - Quicker than someone else.
Fibula - A small lie.
Impotent - Distinguished, well known.
Labour Pain - Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff - A Doctor's cane.
Morbid - A higher offer.
Nitrates - Cheaper than day rates.
Node - Knew it.
Outpatient - A person who has fainted.
Pelvis - Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative - A letter carrier.
Recovery Room - Place to do upholstery.
Rectum - Nearly killed him.
Secretion - Hiding something.
Seizure - Roman emperor.
Tablet. - A small table.
Terminal Illness - Getting sick at the airport.
Tumour - One plus one more.
Urine - Opposite of you're out.
« Last Edit: October 27, 2010, 09:28:23 PM by Marina » Logged

"Anything is possible, if  you  BELIEVE....."  ~~~Joel  Osteen

"Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, Today is a gift..... That is why it is called the present"

*************************************************
 Nov 1979 ~ Diabetes 
Apr. 2004- Nov 2010 ~ CAPD
Nov 9, 2010 ~  Received the  THE  GIFT OF LIFE at 
California Pacific  Medical  center  (CPMC)  in San  Francisco,  CA
Riki
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WWW
« Reply #1 on: October 27, 2010, 06:20:45 PM »

Post Operative cracked me up
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Dialysis - Feb 1991-Oct 1992
transplant - Oct 1, 1992- Apr 2001
dialysis - April 2001-May 2001
transplant - May 22, 2001- May 2004
dialysis - May 2004-present
PD - May 2004-Dec 2008
HD - Dec 2008-present
galvo
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« Reply #2 on: October 27, 2010, 08:55:55 PM »

Nice one, Marina.
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Galvo
Jean
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« Reply #3 on: October 28, 2010, 01:03:51 AM »

Very entertaining, thanks....... :clap;
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One day at a time, thats all I can do.
Des
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« Reply #4 on: October 28, 2010, 05:37:23 AM »

I am going to DILATE :bandance;
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Please note: I am no expert. Advise given is not medical advise but from my own experience or research. Or just a feeling...

South Africa
PKD
Jan 2010 Nephrectomy (left kidney)
Jan 2010 Fistula
Started April 2010 Hemo Dialysis(hate every second of it)
Nov 2012 Placed on disalibity (loving it)
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