What Cracker Jack box did you get that bedside manner from?

[jbeany]

My latest pre-op appointment was yet another experience to add to my list of stupid comments from medical professionals....

I'm finally headed in for surgery to repair my incisional hernia next week.  I'm a mess right now.  The only thing keeping my guts from hanging to my knees is the micro-thin skin graft they put over the open wound in my abdomen last year.  I can't wait for the surgery to get rid of this giant bulge with visible intestine loops.  I can see food and air moving through my intestines just under my skin, and feel it as well.  Ugggh.   


I didn't, of course, actually see the surgeon.  It was a peppy little blonde PA instead.  When we got to the part with the physical exam, she squished around at my guts for a minute, and then just stood and stared at them for a long time.  I finally gave her a questioning look, and she piped up cheerfully with,
"It's so fascinating to see the peristalsis at work!"

She did have the decency to blush when I rolled my eyes and drawled, "Not from this side!"

[okarol]

Nothing like being looked at as a specimen!
I love your response! 

[WishIKnew]

I'm sure all of our "stuff" would be much more fascinating if it weren't happening to us!  I love your response, too.

I have these young, bubbly dialysis techs and their favorite comeback to everything is, "Oh that's normal.  You'll get used to it and everything will get back to normal soon!"  Very annoying.  What is NORMAL and how would they know and just because people quit telling them about concerns doesn't mean those concerns go away.  I think veteran dialysis patients just begin to realize that they don't get it and can't change anything so they just grin and bear it.....  Anyway, hope the clear view to your innards is gone soon!!!!!

[willowtreewren]

I'm so glad a belly button is on the horizon! 

Love your spunk, too. 

Aleta

[rsudock]

Jbeany when is the surgery?

xo,
R

[jbeany]

I get zipped back up on Monday, June 27th.  1 year, 11 months from the day of my transplant, I might finally be normal shaped again!

[kitkatz]

I get the usual student in to look at the urostomy.  Oh I feel like a specimen. How long have you had that?  Why?  Yada yada.  Oh go away!

[Riki]

I like freaking out students.. especially those who've never seen a fistula before... do they ever jump when they touch it.....

[Iwannabean]

I tell people that my fistula runs on AA cells, I love to see the look on their faces

Iwannabean

[Riki]

I tell people that my fistula runs on AA cells, I love to see the look on their faces

Iwannabean

*LOL*  I'll have to remember that one

When I was a kid on PD, I had a fairly large cycler next to my bed.  One time, when I was in hospital, my aunt happened to come visit us that week, so she slept in my bed while I was gone.  When I got home, there was a stuff monkey sitting on my bed, with a letter in his hand.  My aunt had written the letter, saying that the monkey, she found wandering the streets, and his name was Banana Breath.  She also mentioned that she would have connected herself to the cycler while there as well, but it was a 110v and she was a 220v.

[Whamo]

WishIknew,  I totally relate to the tech's going, "Oh, that's normal."  But I realize, thinking back, that healthcare workers have to grow thick skins because they see so much suffering, according to my cousin, who is a doctor.  He's not really cold.  In fact, he's a cool guy.  MBA and a doctor, he runs a hospital out in the desert, in the part of California where everyone is on welfare.