Who's your donor?

[livecam]

I'm wondering how many cadaveric transplant patients have been able to determine who their donor was?  Some people might want to know, some might not but everyone is bound to be a bit curious.  I wasn't looking to identify mine but after asking a few routine questions at the transplant center, curiousity got the best of me and I was able to do it.  It wasn't through official channels, just a gathering of the facts and a little investigative work on the internet.  I also sort of know that the guy who was in the IMU with me that day received the other kidney from the same donor.  In the old days not so long ago if you wanted to know you had to ask the center who asked the donor family if it was alright to say.  Nowadays although that is the preferred method the internet allows us to know more and more.  What was your experience?  Do you know?  Did you contact the family?

[coravh]

I have a friend who received a kidney 2 months ago. He was told it was a 20 year old male who had passed away. All he did was read the obituaries. The donor's family included the fact that he had saved a number of lives through donation. So it was a bit of a no-brainer for him to find out who the donor was.

Cora

[okarol]

Many transplants centers give you the option of writing a thank you note to the
donor's family. In it you can include your personal info and give them the option
of contacting you. Many donor families yearn to know the well-being of the person
their loved one donated to, but never get the chance to find out.
~Karol

[BigSky]

When I had  a transplant no one was told anything about who the donor was or what happened.  Often thought about going back and asking some stuff now that things have changed a bit and see if my hunches were right on some stuff.

[Rerun]

I was told it was a 23 year old male who was in a car accident.  I, too, had someone get the morning paper and I found him.  I was 25 at the time.  Although I did write the family a thank you letter I wondered everyday what he was like and wanted to tell the family how grateful I was for their decision.

After about six years I wrote the family my letter and sent a gift box that had some homemade slippers some candy, a tape of "our" song "What a Difference You Made In My Life" by Ronnie Millsap.  They contacted the center and wanted to meet me.

We met in a small restaurant.  Just my husband, me, Bonnie (donor Mom) and her neighbor lady.  Wayne (donor dad) and Topper (donor brother) didn't want anything to do with me.

Now after 13 years we get together a couple of times a year and call each other, email etc.  We are family even though my kidney is now gone. 

I think donor families would like to know part of their loved one lives on.

Sad Story:  It was Valentine's Day and Jimmy (Donor) and Topper forgot to get their Mom a card so went to the store.  It was raining and the Chevy Blazer he was driving hydroplaned.  His head must have tapped the side window because there wasn't a mark on him.  His Mom heard the sirens and somehow she knew it was Jimmy.

[Panda_9]

Ive always had intentions of contacting the family, but I didnt want to risk upsetting them. And now its gone, I dont think I will.