Adversity, how sweet thy sting becomes

Adversity, how sweet thy sting becomes

By MARTHA BROWN • August 17, 2008

Recently, we have been faced with the adversity of expensive oil, political shouting, food shortages and price increases.

Combine these with the threat or global warming and we have some pretty anxious thoughts filling our minds.

In the face of all this adversity, why are some people finding solutions that inspire and motivate others? I've come to the conclusion that it is our common enemies that bring us together as a tribe. Could it be that cheering for our side unites us?

I wrote an article 20 years ago for this paper that spoke to adversity. That was during a major snow event .

It seemed people were happy -- almost neighborly shoveling for each other, offering rides, running errands for shut-ins or elderly friends. There was excited talk about which stores had bread, milk and toilet paper -- the most important of the quickly disappearing grocery items.

Some children couldn't get to school for a day. But the newfound camaraderie among people was obvious. My conclusion was adversity creates its own simpatico.

Recently someone coined the phrase "the inner farmer" which resonates with me. I have an inner farmer. I want to get up in the morning and check my two tomato plants and clip my herbs and eat something I grew. With the price of food going higher and shortages predicted more people are gardening.

During WWII "Victory Gardens" brought fresh produce to American families. Since our recent round of inflation and fear, I've had numerous conversations with friends about how to grow or cook fresh vegetables and how to keep them clean. There are new magazines devoted to organic gardening.

Everywhere we look there are tips and solutions for the greening of the planet. People are trying and learning and sharing with each other.

There are recycling efforts everywhere in the country, even places to save yard waste and share the resulting mulch. Children are enjoying reading recycling codes on packaging and knowing what can be recycled. People are trying to reduce their carbon footprints by driving less, using air conditioning in moderation and finding ways to be more responsible with dear Mother Earth.

Nike recycles tennis shoes to make rubberized soft courts for sports play, Verizon rehabs old cell phones for domestic violence victims.. We are carrying more reusable bags to the grocery and e talking -- really talking -- about adversity but with joy in our voices.

An example very close to home is the health crisis my husband and I are facing. I have Stage IV kidney cancer. I am living a great life and feeling very thankful.

However this last month has brought us more challenges than any time in the past.

I had a retinal detachment and then scheduled lung surgery to remove a cancerous nodule while his kidney failure took a rapid, downward spiral. I was released from the hospital one day, he started dialysis the next.

We can't drive or exert ourselves and worry about how to get to dialysis and doctor's appointments. Yet we seem closer.

We have talked more and sat together and hugged more since we are both sick and confined to our home.

Our common struggle and historical love has brought us back to some of the things we used to feel. For better or worse...

In the past I have rolled my eyes when people have talked about the "gift" of cancer. "Right," I would say.

Although I have fought this disease for many years, it has only been more recently that I have come to discern anything positive about it.

I celebrate every day with a renewed happiness. I see the people I love more often. I have learned to accept help as well as to offer it, and to enjoy the extended hands of others.

This is a wonderful, growing time in my life and some of it is, I dare say, a "gift."

Martha Brown, of Newark, is a member of The News Journal's Community Advisory Board.

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