I have had it up to here (and by here I am pointing to my neck!)

[tbarrett2533]

I am warning you all that this thread is a rant!!!!! READ with caution and at your own risk!!!!!


 

DIALYSIS is friggin is sucking what life I have left right the hell out of me!!!!

DIALYSIS oh how I friggin hate how you control my every god damn move and every aspect of my ENTIRE life from where I go to what I eat, how and when I sleep!! and yea yea yea I should be grateful that DIALYSIS is what keeps me alive in order to type this lil rant................ blah blah blah bullsh*t

I have no friends or family that want to be tested to see if they are donors so I will sit on "the list" for a good 8-10 years at which point I will be too old to have children (which btw was the only friggin reason I decided to go trhough with transplant in the first place was so that I could have a family) but that is all just going to be a HUGE waste of my time............. so then I get the idea to advertise for a kidney so a reporter does a story on me and I make the front page of my Sunday paper in my local paper which has over 10,000 readers hoping that at least one person woluld see it and offer up their kidney to me..... "the girl who is always waiting....... waiting to have a family" would you blve that not ONE single person even sent me an email wishing me good luck let alone a friggin kidney! like my BF says "people do not care about other people!" I hate to say it, but I am afraid he is right!

then.............................
I start having trouble draining AGAIN!!! I will drain out like 1000 then nothing... then pain..... then NOTHING!!!
WTF!!! why does this keep happenng??? NO ONE seems to know the god damn answer to this and yet it keeps friggin happening to me and I cant stand it!! so I have had NO DIALYSIS AT ALL since late Wednesday and why call Mandy b/c she wont do anything, she hasnt in the past and the neph will just say well if she does not start dialysis at home then she will have to come in and get a chair (it seems like he just cant friggin wait to get me in there to the god damn chair) well you know what hows about you shove that chair right in your ass b/c if you think I am going in for an in-center hemo treatment well you have another thing coming b/c I am not and well NO ONE can meke me either!!! that shit is like pure torture hell for my body (and yes some people tolerate it better than others, but I am not one of them people)  and tell me why in the hell this keeps happening to me every few weeks???

I will be fine... treatments great.... ufs 1500mls a day total treatment times 15-22 minutes for a few weeks then out of no friggin where BAM!! pain usually in my right side (feels like my cath is pushed up agaisnt my membrane wall) and no or really slow very painful drains... they sent me for a x-ray and the cath is right where it should be and then they say well ur cath may have migrated over to the side!!!! well how about it friggin migrate over to the other side then!!!
so when this happens the pain is so intense and I am unable to remove any solution I just dont do any treatmments and its becoming so frustrating and I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE and there is no god damn end in sight I am so tired from kidney faillure!!! it has robbed me from so much and I just really dont know how much more I can handle with it!!!!
I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired............. god damn I just feel like I need a good hard cry!!! and some friggin answers as to why this keeps happening and how to make it stop!!!!!
OH and when this happens I pactially stand on my head and every other postion you can imagine to try to get the god damn solution to come out............... but nothting just the god damn pain on my side!!!!!

[JLM]

Hey gal, I am so sorry you are having all this difficulty.   Sometimes you just got to get mad and rant and rage for a while.  Have you been using Heparin in you solution bag mayhaps it would help.  I usually do it once a week do that.  There was a suggestion to pinch the line to break the suction, but that was with the cycler.  I feel for you and will put you on my prayer list

[MaryD]

Pinching the line works with CAPD too.  Are you trying that before you do your jiggling around?  But your pain/discomfort sounds way out there - more than the end of the cather suctioning on a little bit of your insides.

The only other thing I can think of is constipation.  I have managed to avoid that, but it is supposed to make draining difficult.

I hope you get it sorted soon.  Your CAPD story has been an inspiration to me

[jadey]

Pain at the side sounds like catheter dislodged. This happened to me very recently when I complained about my pain!

I took laxatives for 2 days and the problem is fixed. Have you tried that? The nurse told me that it may not be due to constipation but laxatives just help you move the bowels which will slowly shift your catheter back into position.

About the transplant thing... from what I understand you had a local announcement on the paper right? Have you considered looking online? It can be tricky but I think it is sometimes easier to find that special someone when you have a larger population to work with.

Sorry to hear all the pain you have been going through! Hang in there.. I think you can get a transplant!

[Joe]

I"m presuming you are pinching off the line before you try to dislodge or move the catheter around. My nurse explained to me that you have to break that suction before it will dislodge. And yes, it works for CAPD as well as CCPD, I've used it with both (in fact I just did not 10 minutes ago for my manual drain that was going really slow - opened it right up). Good luck, and use the RED clamps 

[highway61]

Wow, TB, I feel so bad for you. You have been through so much and come so far. You have been such an inspiration for me. It is so hard to hear that you are going through this. I sure hope it gets better. You will be in our prayers.

[tbarrett2533]

I have not EVER before pinched off the line...... never heard of it before either, But I will def try this next time this happens and I am sure it will happen AGAIN!!
I do in fact use heparin (almost always as soon as I start to have the problem b/c SOMETIMES it will solve the issue before it gets out of hand)
so let me get this straight while I am filling keep my transfer set on and just clamp of the line running in/out with my hand is that right?? then try my moving around?? how long do I stay "pinched" for??
I MAKE sure that I "GO" to the bathroom at least once a day and ALWAYS if needed take a stool softner so I know thats not the issue


Joe.... funny story when I placed my Baxter order last month I asked them if they could PLEASE send me some RED clamps (I LOVE them so much more than the BLUE ones as they are much more sturdy) so anyway, they told me that if I want the RED clamps then I need to call my unit and have them place it on my order sheet before I could order them................ CRAZY huh? I was like........... "ITs clamps, not a different prescription."  Weirdos!!!

thanks in advance for the input and thanks for listenting to me rant a Little (that alone makes me feel better sometimes  )

[MaryD]

I just close the flow off with the twist part of the end of my catheter.  You only have to do it for a matter of seconds - just enough to break the suction.  If that does not work, close it off again and do your wriggling around which should move the other end of your catheter to a new place.  The discomfort goes instantly - as soon as the suction is broken

[tbarrett2533]

I just close the flow off with the twist part of the end of my catheter.  You only have to do it for a matter of seconds - just enough to break the suction.  If that does not work, close it off again and do your wriggling around which should move the other end of your catheter to a new place.  The discomfort goes instantly - as soon as the suction is broken

Oh I think I get what you are saying.............. I will close my transfer set when/if I have either drain or fill pain, but when this particular issue occurs this is far beyond doing this.......... (I do this, but it still will be very very very painful and ususally is associated with NO/SLOW drains) so like I said, I just stop ALL treatments usually for a few days (I will try to do treatments a few times a day, but usually am not successful in doing so for at least (3-4 days) so during this time I will just watch what I eat and drink and really limit everything ya know just like I HAD to do while on the dreaded HEMO!!! 
anyway when I have pain at all or if I am filling to fast or draining to fast and get cramps or pain in my shoulders while doing treatments I will just close my transfer set for a few seconds to literally catch my breath!!! then crank it up!!!!

[Joe]

I just use one of those handy-dandy red clamps and clamp the line for a couple of seconds, move around to shake things loose, and then pull the clamp. I tyro to stay away from my catheter unless I've just washed my hands.

And I didn't realize red clamps were part of your prescription..that is funny.