Depression

[doglvr02]

I everyone. It's been awhile since I have posted, but I thought maybe some of you out there could help me. I am entering my 6th year of my se cond round of dialysis. I had a transplant in 1986 that lasted for 18 years and I am waiting from transplant #2. I am listed at two places for an incompatible kidney swap. It seeems like it will never happen. I am stuck in such a rut, doing nothing but computer stuff every day. I can't find it within myself to walk the dog very much, I don't bake anymore, and I have someone come in to clean the house. I know the laundry needs to be done, but here I am on the computer instead of doing it. It is very hard to keep my chin up and my hopes high that this transplant will happen. All I want is to get back to my life as I knew it, do some traveling, get back to work more than a few hours a week, and have the joy for life that I used to.

I also have RLS which seems to be getting worse. I think that I am building up a tolerance to the medication I have been on for 4 years. I can't sleep through the night, waking up at 3:00 or 4:00 every morning. At night, I can't watch TV, all I want to do is go to bed.

Have any of you out there experienced this problem and what have you done about it. Please let me know.   

[Quickfeet]

It's a rough road we travel. It got to the point where positive thinking just wasn't enough. I didn't want to do it, but I added prozac and wellbutrin. They have helped me alot. I still struggle with what I have lost, but I can deal with it now.

[MooseMom]

I'd be surprised if you were NOT depressed.  I agree with quickfeet.  Think seriously about medication.  I'd hate to see you waste more of your life.  That sense of loss can be soul destroying.  To have been able to enjoy life and then find yourself back on dialysis for years...Oh God, what a nightmare.  Is there a particular reason that you have had to wait so very long for your second transplant?  Is there some complication?

[okarol]

Hi doglvr02,
I am so sorry, you've been through so much and I hope you can get a transplant soon. Where are you located? Is your PRA high? What blood type are you? You say you're in compatible donor swaps so I am assuming you've got a living donor willing but not a match. What blood type is the donor? There may be other solutions.
I know the feeling. I sat online for 3 years trying to understand the system, and looking for a donor after 9 of our family and friends were unsuitable for Jenna. It takes a toll on your life and the future can look bleak. I agree, getting some help with anti-depressants may be good to help you cope at present. The stress is definitely overwhelming.
Best wishes,
Karol
 

[sullidog]

I'm about to get on the list for my first transplant. I've been on d since May. I find it hard also to do the things that I once did, I still do work part time but not every day dpending on how I feel. I use to have RLS and would continously wake up at night and sometimes couldn't sleep. My problem was not depression but the toxins that were building up in my body. You may want to get on some depression meds and also may want to check your labs and clearences.
Best of luck!
Troy

[Rerun]

You need to be physically ready for your new kidney when it comes.  So get your butt up and walk the dog.  Bend over and pick up the laundry and move.  You will do much better in recovery and get back to your life if you are in shape. 

         

Rerun, Moderator

[Lisa]

Welcome..
I agree with Rerun! (is that rare?) lol

I just lost my 2nd transplant after 15 yrs...Back on the big D for only a month and I am struggling to get things moving faster so I CAN go back to work!!