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Dialysis Discussion => Dialysis: News Articles => Topic started by: okarol on May 03, 2008, 11:15:18 PM
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Article published May 3, 2008
A life appreciated
Retired police officer to be remembered at Kidney Walk
By NANCY DE GENNARO
degennaro@dnj.com
Although Murfreesboro's Greg Francis took kidney dialysis three times a week for 26 years, he never let it slow him down.
"He always told me ... it's what you make up your mind to do," said his wife, Leigh Francis of Murfreesboro.
Greg died in late 2007 from medical complications from a spinal injury — likely from bones that had become brittle due to extended dialysis. And on May 10, he will be remembered and honored at the annual Rutherford County Kidney Walk.
The dedicated volunteer and family man also left behind his wife and their two young children, Ellen, 8, and Stephen, 4.
Medical challenges
As a young child, Greg suffered from a renal obstruction that threatened his life. Urine would back up into his kidneys and over time, the toxins destroyed those vital organs completely.
"Doctors told his parents he probably would not live to be 16," Leigh said.
But he did live much longer than expected, and he thrived. Although he later became the owner of a printing business, Greg began his career path as a law enforcement patrol officer.
By 1982, Greg opted for a kidney transplant. He was hopeful this would be his ticket to good health. However, 19 months after the surgery, his new kidney failed and was removed.
Once again Greg was back to doing dialysis, a time-consuming medial treatment that does the job of the kidneys: purifies the blood. Essentially, dialysis acts as a filtering system for toxins.
For many, dialysis is a debilitating ritual that takes over a patient's life. Because many patients are so sick by the time they end up on dialysis, even the most basic tasks in daily life are difficult.
Greg's health was stable, although somewhat compromised due to dialysis. So he managed to incorporate the lengthy treatments — typically three to four hours at a time — into his busy schedule of running a Nashville-based publishing business and raising a family.
"Dialysis ... that's not who he was," said Leigh. "He was a hard-working businessman and a wonderful husband and father."
His own children had no idea his health was so compromised because Leigh said Greg didn't want his intuitive little Ellen to worry about her Daddy.
In fact, many people who didn't know Greg well had no idea he underwent dialysis. To him, it was just a minor inconvenience.
"Greg just made it look easy," Leigh recalled.
Dialysis wasn't necessarily easy for him, though. It was hard on his system and he, like other patients, had to watch his diet and take supplements to replenish what the treatments took from his system.
"Dialysis takes out the bad stuff, but it takes some of the good, too," Leigh said.
While taking one of Leigh's kidneys could have been an option for Greg, he felt that it wasn't fair to the children to compromise their mother's health with such an undertaking. Instead, he kept taking dialysis.
Attitude is key
What his health troubles did was make Greg appreciate life more, Leigh explained.
"With Greg, there was nothing he took for granted. ... He realized every day was a gift and he used it wisely," Leigh said, her eyes welling with tears. "I've never known anyone who could appreciate a sunrise or a sunset like he did ... and the way he loved me and our children," she said, trailing off.
"He knew God left him here for a reason, and he said the reason was to be with me and to be Ellen and Stephen's dad," she continued.
Greg didn't dwell on his health situation, nor did Leigh.
The two married in 1992, long after Greg started dialysis. So Leigh was aware that his health could be compromised, but it wasn't anything that they focused on as a couple. After seven years of marriage, they welcome Ellen, and Stephen followed four years later.
Greg just didn't let anything stand in his way of living life to its fullest. Nor did his health rob him of time with his beloved children.
"He did all the things great dads do and maybe a little more. He never missed a chance to read a story to (Ellen and Stephen) or miss a chance to do something with them, ever," Leigh said.
He was especially close to Ellen, who gave an eloquent and poignant speech at the Kidney Walk kick-off celebration recently. In Ellen's own words, she told audience members, "We were so lucky to have a special father."
Ellen said she and Stephen "just loved being with him" most of all. Many mornings the father of two would wake Ellen early so they could spend time together before he would jet off to Nashville for work or dialysis.
"On (school) breaks, I would go to work with him," Ellen said. "We did a lot of things together. ... He was the best dad in the whole world."
Road's end
Although Greg had undergone dialysis for so many years, it wasn't his extended health troubles that caused his untimely death, but a spinal fracture. At the time, he had contracted strep virus that had gotten into his bloodstream and wreaked havoc on his system. Somewhere along the way, he sustained a bone fracture in his neck.
After being hospitalized for two weeks, he went home for a couple of weeks before he died. At the time, nobody knew the end was near.
"Those two weeks were a gift from God," Leigh said, recalling nightly meals and close family time for those remaining days.
Eventually he went back into the hospital and was undergoing dialysis when his heart stopped once and he was resuscitated. Leigh just happened to be there during the whole incident with their church's pastor, Ed Myers, at her side — a "coincidence" Leigh said she knows God orchestrated. The next time his heart stopped, it never started again.
Doctors later told Leigh that if Greg had lived, he likely would have been paralyzed from the neck down.
Though hard to bear, Leigh said she knows Greg would not have wanted to live with a grim quality of life, unable to "do what he was supposed to do."
New beginning
The past six months have not been easy for Leigh and the children. But friends and family have surrounded them with love and assistance. Leigh said her mother and twin sister, Lisa, are always around to help out with the children, whether it's doing housework, running errands or simply spending the night there at the house.
Church members have also been an ever-present help. Every day for the first two months after Greg's passing, the family had meals brought from fellow Advent Lutheran members along with parents of children from Providence Christian Academy, where Ellen attends school. One of the moms at PCA even became the 8-year-old's "lunch lady" for school meals.
"Even Stephen's preschool teachers, who are high school students at Riverdale, have tended to our needs," Leigh said. "I know we could not be where we are without the help of those people."
Many others have shared personal stories about Greg, too, through calls and letters. From the fellow dialysis patients he would counsel to the nonprofit organizations in town he helped, Leigh said Greg had many friends.
For Leigh and the children, Greg lives on through stories they share together.
"We talk about him a lot," Leigh said.
While Stephen is a bit too young to truly comprehend his father's death, Ellen's wise and intuitive nature has stayed strong through some tough times. There are tears but also moments of joy and laughter when they remember the good moments they had with him.
"Ecclesiastics says to everything, there is a season," Leigh said, paraphrasing a Bible passage. "It was unfortunately Greg's time to die."
So the family continues to move forward in life, including participating in the Kidney Walk and raising awareness about organ donation — just as Greg would have wanted, Leigh said.
Still, there are good days and bad days.
"We don't like it; we're not happy with it. ... We're not over it and we're never going to be over it. But we see God's comfort daily," Leigh said. "That's where we draw our strength."
http://dnj.midsouthnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080503/LIFESTYLE/805030306/1024
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With all the bad in this world a story like this sheds the light on our real purpose in life.