I Hate Dialysis Message Board
Introduction => Introduce Yourself => Topic started by: cannot believe on April 30, 2006, 07:03:14 PM
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Hi,
I cannot believe (hence my name) how many of you have bad experiences with dialysis. My husband (who also happens to be a physician) is a dialysis patient since 1991. He too, suffered from physical problems as a result of infrequent dialyis at a clinic over 40 miles away. He had to travel before dawn to get there, dialyze and return so he could get back to his very full time job.
After searching and not giving up, he now dialyses in the comfort of his own home, while working at his computer and continues to work full time and then some.
Oh, and he is a doc who spends time with his patients so I am sorry so many of you have docs who don't spend time with you. Some of these "high paid" docs don't get much as reimbursement for your care-however. Medicare is not a big spender and Medicaid even (much) less. Socialized medicine and all.
My husband is much better off doing his daily home treatments of 2-3 hours. (he doesn't miss a day believe me) His health is great and since he is a vegetarian and strict with his diet, he does great.
Perhaps you all need help in finding better solutions to dialysis. Life is what you make it and perhaps you need to take charge. Why settle for a less than adequate doctor if you don't think he or she is spending enough time with you. Get another one or tell that doc the way you feel! Improve your diet if you need to. God helps those who help themselves, etc.
We just took a trip to Mexico-dialysis and all! Stayed in a beautiful home and my husband took his supplies on the plane and enjoyed the trip including a 3 day business conference!
So all of you who "hate" and need to "vent"--why don't you just be grateful that because of dialysis--you are alive to tell about it. There's always a better way and my husband found it and keeps busy enjoying the freedoms he has and his liife WITH dialysis. God bless you one and all.
P.S. Bring those nurses some flowers!
P.P.S. reply and perhaps we can help you find a better way! dialysis@yellowstonegetaway.com
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Hi Mrs. Positive.
Welcome to the site.
When you are hooked up yourself, then you can tell me what to think and do. Until then maybe you need to read more posts on this site. Maybe if Kevno just has a more positive attitude his leg won't need to be cut off. Maybe if "Life on Hold" would have been a little more positive about her heart operation, she wouldn't be dead. Maybe if I would have had wonderful positive flowery thoughts about reducing my Prednisone I wouldn't have gone through Steroid Witdrawl.
Maybe your husband, Mr. Positive, gets a little more attention because he is a physician. I sit by one at the clinic and HE is never put on late. He is NEVER taken off late. His physisian stays longer at his chair and they talk shop.
I might be happier too if I would go to Mexico for a week......wait, not Mexico. I live in California. How about Hawaii!
Chemotherapy helps people live too. But, I think people pretty much hate it.
Sorry if I'm crabby, but I haven't slept in 3 nights. When I got my transplant, the first 2 things I noticed were I was hungry and I could SLEEP.
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"So all of you who "hate" and need to "vent"--why don't you just be grateful that because of dialysis--you are alive to tell about it" posted by Cannot believe
My reply:
(Okay, Katherine...Get a grip....Try to be nice.)
I could actually care less about being alive due to dialysis. You know, lady, you know nothing about my life and the choices that have led me here. Please do not judge me for hating being on dialysis and needing to vent. It is the only place I have to vent any feelings right now.
The family does not understand where I am at. The docs try but they really have no idea.
I cannot release the hateful, vengeful, angry part of me on the husband when I feel lousy. He is the best thing I got going for me.
When you live with the Angel of Death looking over your schoulder every day of your life, then you can come talk to me about How I should be feeling lucky to be alive.
I think, you think we are stupid for not being grateful for dialysis. We are not stupid, we are ILL! With a disease that is relentless and will NEVER give us a break as long as we live. ESRD and dialysis are progressive and never let up!
So stick it in your ear, rather than your arm!
Katherine
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As the ADMIN/OWNER for this site I try to stay neutral and be fair to all members but "Rerun" said EXACTLY what I was thinking as did "Kitkatz". Your post sickened me, but I guess it makes you feel better to talk down to people. You came here and posted, not to help us but to belittle this site as well as my members and to show how wonderful your life is.
Your post is so full of shit, I need to clean it off my monitor. Here are the comments I am referring to:
"I cannot believe (hence my name) how many of you have bad experiences with dialysis."
Amazing isn't it, what complainers we are, maybe we should all be punished for venting by holding our arm down and stick needles in....Oh wait...We already do get stuck.
"dialyze and return so he could get back to his very full time job."
With this statement are you trying to make us non workers feel bad? Your husband works, yeah so? Many of our members work full time as well. Do you want a cookie?
"Some of these "high paid" docs don't get much as reimbursement for your care-however."
I laugh to that lets see, lets do the math MY Kaiser/Medicare combo pays my doctor almost $500 a month JUST to see me at the center and I see him maybe once or twice a month for a total of 2 minutes per visit. And my doctor has Several Dozen patients. So you do the math Several Dozen X $500 = $$$$$ By the way what kind of car does you and your husband drive?
"Perhaps you all need help in finding better solutions to dialysis."
Damn, why didn't I think of that. OK everyone put on your thinking caps and lets find an alternative to dialysis. Dialysis whether it be in-center or home still is a terrible way to live.
"Life is what you make it and perhaps you need to take charge."
Hey maybe your catching on, that is why this site is here to give people a voice, to get answers straight from people who actually face the very same situation as they are in. Unlike you who sits on her high horse and throws stones.
"God helps those who help themselves, etc."
I'm religious and all that however I guess that little girl that was found dead in her neighbors bathtub dead and about to be his dinner recently in the news didn't try to help herself enough. Things happen in this world that are way beyond our control. And by my members posting on this site, they ARE helping themselves.
"why don't you just be grateful that because of dialysis--you are alive to tell about it."
Why don't you walk a mile in one of our shoes then talk to us about being grateful. Seriously if you were an actual dialysis patients your comment might mean something but since your NOT, you make me sick to my stomach.
"P.S. Bring those nurses some flowers!"
What? why should I have to kiss their ass, they get paid to perform a duty and to do that duty well for ALL patients, even to the ones that don't kiss their ass. Oh wait maybe your saying that if I kiss their ass they will give me the "Special" treatment that will cure my disease or make the 3 or 4 hours go faster?
"P.P.S. reply and perhaps we can help you find a better way!"
If you really want to help PLEASE never post here again. You have offended EVERY member here and some of the members have been on dialysis their whole life, since they were children. Which is a lot worse than what your husband has faced.
Seriously I can't begin to comprehend what you were hoping to accomplish here by making such an asinine post. With all my problems of kidney failure, being in a wheelchair, and a cancer survivor. Did you really think you could make me change the name of this site to ilovedialysis.com? oh wait that's right you didn't even take the time to read our introductions, you just saw our sites name and made an ass out of yourself. You know what they say when you Assume. If you had the common sense to read many of the posts here and get to know our members, I promise you would have written a much different post. You would have found out that we all have been through a gambit of health problems and much of those problems are related to having kidney failure.
But seriously I don't know why I am even wasting my time on you, when you are not even a patient and you could NEVER understand what it's like. I guess I'm just defending my members because unlike you I actually want to help my members and I do that by giving them a voice. Where as you want to silent that voice.
- Epoman
Owner/Admin
ihatedialysis.com
ihatedialysis.net
ihatedialysis.org
P.S. I just noticed your email address "dialysis@yellowstonegetaway.com" and the actual site http://www.yellowstonegetaway.com Is that your site? and your vacation rental property? if it is I guess your husband makes pretty good money off of sick negative people like us after all. Didn't you say "Some of these "high paid" docs don't get much as reimbursement for your care" But I guess your husband does! If I'm assuming to much as the saying goes, "When you ASSUME you make an ASS out of U and ME. But it's ok because you already are an ASS.
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Hi,
I cannot believe (hence my name) how many of you have bad experiences with dialysis. My husband (who also happens to be a physician) is a dialysis patient since 1991. He too, suffered from physical problems as a result of infrequent dialyis at a clinic over 40 miles away. He had to travel before dawn to get there, dialyze and return so he could get back to his very full time job.
After searching and not giving up, he now dialyses in the comfort of his own home, while working at his computer and continues to work full time and then some.
Oh, and he is a doc who spends time with his patients so I am sorry so many of you have docs who don't spend time with you. Some of these "high paid" docs don't get much as reimbursement for your care-however. Medicare is not a big spender and Medicaid even (much) less. Socialized medicine and all.
My husband is much better off doing his daily home treatments of 2-3 hours. (he doesn't miss a day believe me) His health is great and since he is a vegetarian and strict with his diet, he does great.
Perhaps you all need help in finding better solutions to dialysis. Life is what you make it and perhaps you need to take charge. Why settle for a less than adequate doctor if you don't think he or she is spending enough time with you. Get another one or tell that doc the way you feel! Improve your diet if you need to. God helps those who help themselves, etc.
We just took a trip to Mexico-dialysis and all! Stayed in a beautiful home and my husband took his supplies on the plane and enjoyed the trip including a 3 day business conference!
So all of you who "hate" and need to "vent"--why don't you just be grateful that because of dialysis--you are alive to tell about it. There's always a better way and my husband found it and keeps busy enjoying the freedoms he has and his liife WITH dialysis. God bless you one and all.
P.S. Bring those nurses some flowers!
P.P.S. reply and perhaps we can help you find a better way! dialysis@yellowstonegetaway.com
Just quoting you for prosperity in case you decide to edit your post.
- Epoman
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I cannot believe, cannot believe :o
I see your Husband is "A Physician" ???
Tell you the truth all as been said, I cannot be bothered. Just to say YOU have not seen the true side of dialysis. Yes we all have our up and downs. But we all help each other on this site. Which is more than some PHYSICIANS do >:(
I am happy for YOU, that your Husbands (The Physician) is doing OK.
I cannot believe your thoughts :o, but I feel, maybe because your husband is a Physician. Dialysis as been made a bit easier for you.
Maybe you need a reality check up :-\
Kevno
( sorry you have had a lot of stick, but you have come to the wrong place. to say what you did)
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You are an idiot. If you had at least read the intro, you would know that we ARE grateful. But being grateful does not preclude being annoyed. Or in pain. Or angry.
Your self righteous, smarmy post was in no way meant to be helpful to others. It was meant to show your superiority. At which, by the way, it failed.
You are obviously one of those pathetic women who lives through her husband because she has no accomplishments of her own.
If, at this stage in your life, you do not realize that the saying "There but for the Grace of God go I" is true, then I hope you find out, soon, horribly , and with a vengeance. >:D
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Hi,
I cannot believe (hence my name) how many of you have bad experiences with dialysis. My husband (who also happens to be a physician) is a dialysis patient since 1991. He too, suffered from physical problems as a result of infrequent dialysis at a clinic over 40 miles away. He had to travel before dawn to get there, dialyzed and return so he could get back to his very full time job.
After searching and not giving up, he now dialyses in the comfort of his own home, while working at his computer and continues to work full time and then some.
Oh, and he is a doc who spends time with his patients so I am sorry so many of you have docs who don't spend time with you. Some of these "high paid" docs don't get much as reimbursement for your care-however. Medicare is not a big spender and Medicaid even (much) less. Socialized medicine and all.
My husband is much better off doing his daily home treatments of 2-3 hours. (he doesn't miss a day believe me) His health is great and since he is a vegetarian and strict with his diet, he does great.
Perhaps you all need help in finding better solutions to dialysis. Life is what you make it and perhaps you need to take charge. Why settle for a less than adequate doctor if you don't think he or she is spending enough time with you. Get another one or tell that doc the way you feel! Improve your diet if you need to. God helps those who help themselves, etc.
We just took a trip to Mexico-dialysis and all! Stayed in a beautiful home and my husband took his supplies on the plane and enjoyed the trip including a 3 day business conference!
So all of you who "hate" and need to "vent"--why don't you just be grateful that because of dialysis--you are alive to tell about it. There's always a better way and my husband found it and keeps busy enjoying the freedoms he has and his life WITH dialysis. God bless you one and all.
P.S. Bring those nurses some flowers!
P.P.S. reply and perhaps we can help you find a better way! dialysis@yellowstonegetaway.com
>:( >:(I have been wandering around my house this morning after reading this condescending post, trying to cool off. I'm going to address several of your comments. First off, a physician that is receiving infrequent dialysis doesn't impress me much and shows how little he knew about his own condition. ??? He only traveled 40 miles before dawn (no mention of his supportive wife going with him) to get there, dialyzed and go to his very full time job. 5 years ago we had to travel 75 miles (ONE WAY) to get dialysis because the clinic that was closer would not take my husband, they said he was too critically ill and they did want him to die on their watch. All of us on this board are glad your physician husband has a very full time job. My husband would give any number of body parts to be able to return to work (he gave 20 years to the United States military, so your sorry ass can say and do things freely). Also, for the record, we are home hemo patients, I'm the one that gets to stick my husband 3 times a week, watches him cramp, feel sick to his stomach, get headaches and crash for 3 to 4 hours. (I wonder where you are when you physician husband is doing he's dialysis). :-\ Some of these "high paid" docs don't get much as reimbursement for your care-however. Socialized medicine and all.
. You really should do your homework before making your political statements. The lowest paid doctors in the United States make an average of $200.00 per hour, not bad considering the guy in Iraq is making $40.00 per hour. You don't mention what kind of vehicle you drive, but I'm willing to bet it isn't a pick-up truck. As for you physician husband doing better on his daily home dialysis, there are many members on this site that would love to do home hemo but it is not an option to them for many reasons. ??? Your physician husband's health is great since he is a vegetarian, and strict with his diet. You really have pissed me off >:(, my husband, because of some sorry ass physicans that probably shouldn't even qualify to be a veterinary, spent 6 months in hospital, had 21 operations, was on a ventilator for 3 months, lost almost 50 pounds, and OH by the way, his kidneys, can no longer have any nuts, berries, seeds, corn, beans, salads, uncooked vegetables or any high fiber foods. Try it, you'll like it.
What the hell kind of comment is Perhaps you all need help in finding better solutions to dialysis. This shows just how stupid your are, there is only 3 solutions to kidney failure, DIALYSIS, TRANSPLANT or DEATH. We don't know where you live, and I for one could give a rats ass, but where we are, you can't just go and find another doctor because there aren't any and moving just isn't an option either. All the members of this site and their spouses would love to take a trip to Mexico and stay in a beautiful home but most of us cannot afford to do that and our wonderful doctor's would never approve, it would put dent in their cash register flow. You keep mentioning your physician husband found a better way to live, I assume you didn't have input, what, to busy looking at vacation homes, or getting your hair and nails done! P.S. Bring those nurses some flowers! >:( You have got to be kidding, the clinic where we go has some good nurses, but a couple of them I wouldn't give you a dime for, they treat patients like second class citizens and their comments about people just dying to get in the door make me sick, the only thing I'd like to give them is one bullet (and do the world a favor). As for your last of your comments, So all of you who "hate" and need to "vent"--why don't you just be grateful that because of dialysis--you are alive to tell about it. I will speak for myself here, I'm grateful for EPOMAN and this website to learn all I can about kidney failure and dialysis to make better, more educated decisions about my husbands health and his treatment. Being a full time caregiver, having this site to come to and read other people's stories and solutions has been a great comfort to me. We, that are involved with dialysis, either patient or caregiver, need this site to vent our frustrations and know that someone out there has, is, or will be going through the same and can give help, even if only by their words. I will end my rant here. I was looking forward to a warm, beautiful, sunny, non-dialysis day but it has started on a very sour note.
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Hey guys I thought you might like to see the email that "cannot believe" sent me as her reply, she can't even come back and defend herself. So I guess she does own http://www.yellowstonegetaway.com Hell if I owned that and made that much in rental income, I would love life too. Enjoy:
<snip>
Do you guys help each other do anything but comiserate? No wonder you have problems with physicians--some of you seem to hate them. Too bad. Maybe next time around you'll all have perfect bodies--and become physicians!
"Hate" is a very strong word. I don't wish to edit what I said so you can remove it if you desire..
My "physician" husband never complains and he's been through a lot. He nearly died twice due to complications but he doesn't "hate". He went to school for 12 years. He works hard. He has goals. What do any of you have? He doesn't have time to "hate". He is grateful. He said to me last night "I love dialysis".
Sounds like some of you prefer not to accept your lot in life. Too bad We all have rough days, weeks months, years.
Should we have "I hate single mom life" sites, "I hate teaching" life, "I hate paralysis" life?
Accept what you have, learn from it and learn to love life free...............
Remove me from your site. Thank you. I love dialysis. That means I can be with my husband no matter what.
</snip>
Did you read where she said: He said to me last night "I love dialysis". ::)
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Having just come home from dialysis and feeling rotten... check my mail and find fecking crap like this??? Makes me sick...
I love dialysis... huh... can you hear me screaming???? >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D >:D
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Look, when you live with a demanding BITCH you had better be positive and work your ass off to keep her happy! I would bet that if he would get rid of her, he would be more realistic. The minute he can't support her every whim, she will dump like a hot rock.
The Physician that I sit by does not work anymore and his snooty wife doesn't like it. You can tell that her dreams and lifestyle were severely disrupted.
They say money can't buy happiness. Bull-Shit. They just tell poor people that so they don't riot! (Line from Desparate Housewives)
Way to go TEAM. I was the first one to reply and so I really didn't give it to her like I wanted. I was trying to be a GOOD moderator but I LOVED what Epoman and the rest of you wrote.
I am proud that no one used the "F" word because we have young readers too. (But I know you were thinking it) :)
I love all of you! ;D
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OH, wait a minute. I got a personal message:
The message they sent you was:
Doctors are those whose parents are doctors? (That is from my signature line)Why do so many on this site seem to "hate" doctors, to "hate" dialysis? Isn't that biting the hand that feeds you? What do any of you actually "like" or "love", anything? Or are you all to busy "hating"?
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Listen Lady (term used loosely)
The reason MOST of us are here is because of misdiagnosis from the "Medical Community." I was misdiagnosed 3 months with a ear infection and it was "Kidney Failure." I pretty much lost my respect for doctors right then. I basically need them because they can write prescriptions and I cannot.......legally. You need to read "Black's" post to see why we don't trust Doctors. http://ihatedialysis.com/forum/index.php?topic=385.0
I would write more but I need to go get a fistula-gram because it wasn't DONE right the first time. >:(
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Right now I am so outraged I am speechless!
I'll post once I have cooled down.
The nerve of this woman. >:(
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First of all. I agree, I do know a couple of good Doctors.
If it was not for a Doctor.
It would have been found out early that I had reflux, it was to late when I was 6years old 34years ago. I would not be on this site. I would have been one of those well people. The kidney could have been saved if the doctor did not call my Mum a worrier and send her away >:( It took my Mum over 3years to get the doctors to send me for the tests >:(
When I had my transplant 13years old a doctor saying and I quote "OH, let him starve!"
I would have not been OD on morphine 3 times in ICU each time for over a week. >:(
Gone down for One operation and had a different operation than I signed for.
Had a Doctor looking at my X-rays saying he could do this and that to me. Until I explained to him, he had the X-ray upside down.
Had a Doctor promise me I would never have to go back onto Haemo. Been back on Haemo for six years now.
Had a Doctor say. I would only have to wait a few month are a bit longer for a transplant. Been 18years waiting. >:(
A Doctor put the wrong staples put in my neck. took over two minutes to get each one out.
Plus about the hand that feeds you :o I know you have that the wrong way around!!!!!
If you want more examples of Doctors, My E-mail is in my profile.
IHateDialysis.com has helped me more than most Doctors have ever done.
I know Hate is a strong word, but if your husband "The Physician" likes Dialysis then all I can say is LUCKY HIM :o
I do not think anybody on this site Hates Doctors. We just wish that they were a bit more understanding. Plus in a lot less of a hurry, to get around the unit >:(
I do not know Why I have been so nice to you after what you have said about the patients on this site. I suppose I can not be bitchy like you >:(
I have seen so much, from the first child I saw die when I was 7years old, my girlfriend dying while having an transplant. To just a few weeks ago a long term renal patient dying, while his wife is pregnant.
Kevno
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I don't get pissed often but lady you pissed me off. As for good Docs and bad, I have had both. Would not have an ostomy on my side and ESRD if it were not for a doctor misdiagnosing a bladder infection for stomach flue at 4 years old. A GOOD Doc figured out what was happening but it was months later and too late to save my bladder and Kidneys. Spend over a year in hospital and had to learn to walk again. I SURVIVED. Dialysis came later in life. Do I like it , HELL NO. Do I accept it, yes because I want to go on surviving and living. Yes I work 40-50 Hrs a week and volunteer at the Fire Hall, Training new recruits and I also make fire calls. I do this in spite of my dialysis, not because of it. The nurses call me stubborn, say they would like me to slow down but deep down they know this is not going to happen. Hell my triple by pass only slowed me down for about six months. I have people ask me how I do it all the time, others that tell me I shouldn't be doing those things. Its my life , and I will go down living life to the fullest.
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Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.
Martin Luther King, Jr
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Do you guys help each other do anything but comiserate? No wonder you have problems with physicians--some of you seem to hate them. Too bad. Maybe next time around you'll all have perfect bodies--and become physicians!
"Hate" is a very strong word. I don't wish to edit what I said so you can remove it if you desire..
My "physician" husband never complains and he's been through a lot. He nearly died twice due to complications but he doesn't "hate". He went to school for 12 years. He works hard. He has goals. What do any of you have? He doesn't have time to "hate". He is grateful. He said to me last night "I love dialysis".
Sounds like some of you prefer not to accept your lot in life. Too bad We all have rough days, weeks months, years.
Should we have "I hate single mom life" sites, "I hate teaching" life, "I hate paralysis" life?
Accept what you have, learn from it and learn to love life free...............
Remove me from your site. Thank you. I love dialysis. That means I can be with my husband no matter what.
</snip>
Did you read where she said: He said to me last night "I love dialysis". ::)
Who does this stupid woman think she is. She sounds like a woman who has her nose shoved so far up her arse and seems to think we have no idea what we are on about. Well love, I would love to come back into this world in a perfect body, and with a bit of luck you will come back in mine :-*. I have a disabled son, deal with dialysis and a few other problems I really don't wish to tell you, and you know what I deal with them the best I can. I HATE dialysis and the only thing keeping me going is my family. I have had enough of all this crap, but hey what can I do about it. Oh and please do tell what a better solution to dialysis is.....and you know what, I am grateful I am alive. You say your husband loves dialysis... do you think we are stupid, oh yeh, we all love dialysis as we are cramping and going flat, you are full of s@3t...Liz ::)
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GGGGRRRRRRRRRR!!!! (that's it. I can say no more tonight!)
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WOW!!!! Did anyone read the post in "working while on Dialysis"? It seems the doctor himself posted that one under the same name "cannot believe". Anyway, I kinda wish we were not so hard on her/him I would have loved to see more posts from someone who has had a happy movie experience on dialysis. Yes I don't agree with her post I think she is not really informed or aware of how dialysis REALLY effects her husband, he is sugar coating it for her that is for sure and her greater then thou attitude is appalling. She also has no understanding of what this community is about, people sharing a common issue and venting on what is bothering us, what hurts us and the best part helping keep others informed of what to do and what to stay away from. She definitely did not understand the fact that while we all appreciate dialysis we also hate what it does to our lives, bodies and minds like I said before she is not getting the whole story from her doctor husband (surprise there a doctor lies and sugar coats dialysis ;D). Maybe we could have been better at explaining our true intentions of this site and found a doctor who we could have a dialogue with (whether he understood or not) about his and our true experiences with that would have been productive. Just a thought.
Geoff
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:o I can't believe this woman, isn't it nice that she and her husband have such a rosy life Lucky them.
Why is it always some one who has never been on dialysis that thinks they know it all?
If she is so good why hasn't she given hubby a kidney?
They just went on a nice trip how special for them. I noticed there is no mention of any other responsabilities in their life.
I wonder if she would find life just a rosy if she were also taking care of 3 kids and elderly parents on top of every thing else.
I bet they never even see their families or help them in any way.
I say the same thing too bad she left because I'm sure there are lots of us here that would like to tell her a little bit more about life.
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:o I can't believe this woman, isn't it nice that she and her husband have such a rosy life Lucky them.
Why is it always some one who has never been on dialysis that thinks they know it all?
If she is so good why hasn't she given hubby a kidney?
They just went on a nice trip how special for them. I noticed there is no mention of any other responsabilities in their life.
I wonder if she would find life just a rosy if she were also taking care of 3 kids and elderly parents on top of every thing else.
I bet they never even see their families or help them in any way.
I say the same thing too bad she left because I'm sure there are lots of us here that would like to tell her a little bit more about life.
dialysis@yellowstonegetaway.com
karen.lor@gmail.com
Well if you would like to tell her anything else here are 2 of her email addresses. ;D Also I did not delete or ban her account so she is free to come back at anytime. Email her tell her to come back. >:D
- Epoman
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OH, wait a minute. I got a personal message:
The message they sent you was:
Doctors are those whose parents are doctors? (That is from my signature line)Why do so many on this site seem to "hate" doctors, to "hate" dialysis? Isn't that biting the hand that feeds you? What do any of you actually "like" or "love", anything? Or are you all to busy "hating"?
****************************************************************************************
Listen Lady (term used loosely)
The reason MOST of us are here is because of misdiagnosis from the "Medical Community." I was misdiagnosed 3 months with a ear infection and it was "Kidney Failure." I pretty much lost my respect for doctors right then. I basically need them because they can write prescriptions and I cannot.......legally. You need to read "Black's" post to see why we don't trust Doctors. http://ihatedialysis.com/forum/index.php?topic=385.0
I would write more but I need to go get a fistula-gram because it wasn't DONE right the first time. >:(
Thanks for mentioning me, Rerun. I hope she read the post. Everyone who replied to her did a great job. (God, I love you guys!!) I was so angry as I read her post, I couldn't even think of what I would say. I'm not on dialysis, and my husband is not yet on dialysis, but I damn well know that her Pollyanna attitude is either ignorance, or denial of what dialysis actually is for almost all dialysis patients. If she really wants to know the truth, she ought to volunteer for a month or so at a local dialysis clinic, but I doubt she would have the guts to last more than a few days.
It appears her husband has done her sooooo wrong by insulating her from reality. I can understand why a man, especially a Doc, would do that, but that makes it no less wrong. I wonder if he protects her from reality in everything, or just the real deal w/ dialysis? There is no good excuse for such ignorance in a Doc's wife. I hope the guy is doing as well as they claim he is doing. If anything happens to him, reality will slap her very hard.
Maybe they'll be back w/ apologies??? We could teach them both a lot they need to know, and despite the horrible first impression they might even have some info we could use.
Lorelle
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I took me a very long time to even start to reply to such a message. I had to take a while because I like to express myself in a decent and composed way. It has been a long time since I have heard such a blatantly patronizing opinion expressed.
Anyway, you guys did the job for me in very clear and succint language. I would like to think that the lady has read your replies, understood our position and understood something about herself as well.
We have a right to rant and vent. And the thing is, that is not all we do. Look how much help I have personally received from this site. Because of this site, I was able to approach my first dialysis session without the fear and dread that was welling up in me. I was given helpful advice that prepared me for dialysis and has been my helpful companion through the entire process.
HOW DARE SHE!!
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I am not on dialysis either and cannot comprehend 1/2 the s*^% most of you go through, someday I will but it doesn't take a genius to see through the Doctors wife. Wait until things get really bad for the Doc, then she'll be back here looking for sympathy or understanding. Then again maybe she'll be too busy spending his money.
An apology is in order but I doubt you all will get one.
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I don't get pissed often but lady you pissed me off. As for good Docs and bad, I have had both. Would not have an ostomy on my side and ESRD if it were not for a doctor misdiagnosing a bladder infection for stomach flue at 4 years old. A GOOD Doc figured out what was happening but it was months later and too late to save my bladder and Kidneys. Spend over a year in hospital and had to learn to walk again. I SURVIVED. Dialysis came later in life. Do I like it , HELL NO. Do I accept it, yes because I want to go on surviving and living. Yes I work 40-50 Hrs a week and volunteer at the Fire Hall, Training new recruits and I also make fire calls. I do this in spite of my dialysis, not because of it. The nurses call me stubborn, say they would like me to slow down but deep down they know this is not going to happen. Hell my triple by pass only slowed me down for about six months. I have people ask me how I do it all the time, others that tell me I shouldn't be doing those things. Its my life , and I will go down living life to the fullest.
fireguy, if you are able to work that much while on dialysis then dont let anyone stop you!!!
As for the doctors wife lady, dont know what to say :-\
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Wow
Can anyone say " let them eat cake " ?
In all honesty this website while it is also a big venting area has always given me great laughs. Don't go thinking we are all here crying all over ourselves.
Because of this wonderfully easy to manage disease called ESRD I was lucky enough to have to drop my whole life at age 22, move to a different country and have to live again with my parents.
I was unable to support myself anymore because of having to go to outrageously expensive for profit doctors and hospitals appointments.
At this stage my whole life is at a halt ..... so really why should I love ESRD and dialysis?
I had plans for my life that now I am unsure if I will ever be able to accomplish them ( living in Asia among other places ) because I will always have this issue of taking care of myself and health insurance etc ..... YEAH LIFE ON ESRD MAKES THINGS SO MUCH EASIER!!!!
Go back to that castle of yours.
I seriously wish I had never read your message so it wouldn't have reinforced in my mind this gap of the US ( seriously ill people ) versus THEM ( clueless people who are condescending on ill ones ).
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Man, you sure can express yourself. WITH YOU ALL THE WAY!!!
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Hi,
I cannot believe (hence my name) how many of you have bad experiences with dialysis. My husband (who also happens to be a physician) is a dialysis patient since 1991. He too, suffered from physical problems as a result of infrequent dialyis at a clinic over 40 miles away. He had to travel before dawn to get there, dialyze and return so he could get back to his very full time job.
After searching and not giving up, he now dialyses in the comfort of his own home, while working at his computer and continues to work full time and then some.
Oh, and he is a doc who spends time with his patients so I am sorry so many of you have docs who don't spend time with you. Some of these "high paid" docs don't get much as reimbursement for your care-however. Medicare is not a big spender and Medicaid even (much) less. Socialized medicine and all.
My husband is much better off doing his daily home treatments of 2-3 hours. (he doesn't miss a day believe me) His health is great and since he is a vegetarian and strict with his diet, he does great.
Perhaps you all need help in finding better solutions to dialysis. Life is what you make it and perhaps you need to take charge. Why settle for a less than adequate doctor if you don't think he or she is spending enough time with you. Get another one or tell that doc the way you feel! Improve your diet if you need to. God helps those who help themselves, etc.
We just took a trip to Mexico-dialysis and all! Stayed in a beautiful home and my husband took his supplies on the plane and enjoyed the trip including a 3 day business conference!
So all of you who "hate" and need to "vent"--why don't you just be grateful that because of dialysis--you are alive to tell about it. There's always a better way and my husband found it and keeps busy enjoying the freedoms he has and his liife WITH dialysis. God bless you one and all.
P.S. Bring those nurses some flowers!
P.P.S. reply and perhaps we can help you find a better way! dialysis@yellowstonegetaway.com
I read this old post and it make me sick.
I am extremely proud of the comments IHD made;
when her arm looks like mine; then we will talk.
when she is so thirsty she's thinking about ending it all
we will talk
when she is too tired to go to Mexico
we will talk
when her bottom is numb only after the first hour with three hours left :rant;
we will talk
and this is for the mormon bitch :sir ken; :puke; :Kit n Stik;
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She made me really mad too! But hey, Twirl, I have some good friends who grew up Mormon -- folks who really go the extra mile for others and try not to judge. I don't think her religion (whatever it may be) had anything to do with it. There are probably some Mormons here on IHD -- kidney disease is no respecter of religions. I really wouldn't want them to feel put down. As for the rest of what you wrote -- Rant on, sister!!! I'm hearing you!!
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What a self righteous bitch. That was the nastiest most condescending thing I have read yet. This woman and her wonderful life and her relaxing trips to Mexico and yada yada. What the hell was that?
She and her perfect little life And her perfect husband with his perfect job and all of these people on this site just whining about their lot in life. Who the hell is she? I love people like this. It makes me realize just how grounded and SMART I really am. When people are this stupid, it makes the rest of us whiners look like rocket scientists, yes? Twirl, you are totally right. When her arm has more needle marks then hair follicles and she is too tired to walk into the next room, then she can talk about it with you. Until then, she needs to visit a different website. How about "my world is rosy and my head is up my ass . com?
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Wow. I read the original post today for the first time. My head spun around like Linda Blair.
Yikes.
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and I thought pricks were something you got at the dialysis center
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As you can tell this
poser I mean poster only posted 2 messages and hasn't been back since April 2006. I wonder how her perfect little life is going. My guess is the Doctor(husband) has kept her in a bubble.
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Please read this.... not Mormon, but moron as in idiot
I am so sorry and embarrassed and ashamed.......... I did not mean to insult anyone.......
I this case, I am the moron...... :oops; and :shy;
Edited: Fixed italic error - okarol/admin
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:rofl; :rofl; :rofl; :rofl; Oh Twirl, you are the greatest. Please don't be too embarrassed -- you gave me the hugest unstoppable right-from-the-belly laugh I've had in weeks. As much at me and my oh-so-serious please-let's-not-be-mean-to-each-other reply as at your typo. You've definitely made my day!
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Wow. This is the first time I saw this posting. I am shocked and appalled at this "lady" (notice the quotation marks!) who would
DARE, on this site, criticize us, without any background. It would be interesting to see what her life is really like, without the
prescription antidepressants she must be taking. She HAS to be taking some, to be so doggone POSITIVE!!!!!
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Excuse me....
:Kit n Stik; :Kit n Stik; :Kit n Stik; :Kit n Stik; :Kit n Stik; :Kit n Stik; :Kit n Stik;
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Thank you Kit!!! You always have a knack with that stick!!!
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She lives in a fantasy land. When I first joined, I felt I needed to take time to get to know people and the style of the boards. She just jumped in and thought she could tell everyone what to do and how to deal. Her life must be full of rainbows and butterflies! Maybe if I lived on a doctors salary, I would be chipper too! I think her husband does not share all his true feelings and keeps her sheltered. My :twocents;
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I hadn't read this post before. How dare she, the patronising pompous cow. Here's a suggestion of what she should kiss :sir ken;
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I was disappointed to see this was originally posted two years ago! I'll bet 10 to 1 (whatever that means) that she still checks in regularly to see what's going on. So this is for her...
"Hi dumbass! :waving; So happy to hear you and your husband enjoyed Mexico "dialysis and all". By the way, what did you do while he was hooked up to his machine? Shop, nap, watch TV, work-out, run up and down the beach, eat your most favorite food, enjoy a cocktail, maybe some chocolate.... My heart goes out to your husband, but you can eat my shorts. ::)
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As usual, I am very late getting to this thread.
Very rarely am I at a loss for words.
Reading the initial posting left me speechless!
Is this lady totally blonde? Has the bleach burned into her brain?
It is hard to try to imagine someone so cold, without the slightest empathy for patients living under a death sentence.
Does her husband really think he is doing her a favor by not telling her the truth about our disease?
Some day reality is going to slap her right in the face, hard. And I'd bet then that she won't have a clue how to handle it other than to take a handful of mind-numbing drugs and stay locked away from the rest of the world.
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I am new to this forum, and have just done my introduction and came across this intro...this makes me really upset (cannot believe).
You should be ashamed of yourself. You have hurt a lot of people. We are fighting for my Mum's life right now, and weighing up if dialysis will save her or cause her more complications.
Really upsetting.
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Hi,
I cannot believe (hence my name) how many of you have bad experiences with dialysis. My husband (who also happens to be a physician) is a dialysis patient since 1991. He too, suffered from physical problems as a result of infrequent dialyis at a clinic over 40 miles away. He had to travel before dawn to get there, dialyze and return so he could get back to his very full time job.
After searching and not giving up, he now dialyses in the comfort of his own home, while working at his computer and continues to work full time and then some.
Oh, and he is a doc who spends time with his patients so I am sorry so many of you have docs who don't spend time with you. Some of these "high paid" docs don't get much as reimbursement for your care-however. Medicare is not a big spender and Medicaid even (much) less. Socialized medicine and all.
My husband is much better off doing his daily home treatments of 2-3 hours. (he doesn't miss a day believe me) His health is great and since he is a vegetarian and strict with his diet, he does great.
Perhaps you all need help in finding better solutions to dialysis. Life is what you make it and perhaps you need to take charge. Why settle for a less than adequate doctor if you don't think he or she is spending enough time with you. Get another one or tell that doc the way you feel! Improve your diet if you need to. God helps those who help themselves, etc.
We just took a trip to Mexico-dialysis and all! Stayed in a beautiful home and my husband took his supplies on the plane and enjoyed the trip including a 3 day business conference!
So all of you who "hate" and need to "vent"--why don't you just be grateful that because of dialysis--you are alive to tell about it. There's always a better way and my husband found it and keeps busy enjoying the freedoms he has and his liife WITH dialysis. God bless you one and all.
P.S. Bring those nurses some flowers!
P.P.S. reply and perhaps we can help you find a better way! dialysis@yellowstonegetaway.com
... I have read it once and then I read it again... and I am still completely speechless !!!!
... And now I have to recover from reading it all ... ???
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P.S Did I hear anyone say: " let them eat cake " ?
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I find Cannot Believes' original post as tone-deaf and reprehensible as the rest of you, but posting personal information online (even if it's publicly available) is considered doxing and is frowned upon on most internet sites.
http://patch.com/massachusetts/malden/what-is-doxing-yes-it-is-illegal
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Edit: Post with personal information was removed. Thank you KitKatz!
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I might be in the minority here, but I don't hate dialysis.
Because of it, I am alive to see my youngest child grow up. I got to be a grandmother and am going to have another grandchild soon. I lost a lot, but then lived to regain so much more. Because of PD I am living my life as I would even if I weren't on dialysis.
To me it's worth the minor inconveniences of doctor visits and monthly labs where my nurses can't find a good vein to draw blood from. It's worth all the extra garbage I produce doing PD. It's even worth the hassle with Baxter over delivering my supplies when I'm actually not at work. It's worth some drain pain here and there and it's even worth the occasional day when I feel kind of cruddy, because I know without it, I'd feel cruddy all the time or be dead.
I think the OP makes some good points, if in a rather condescending manner. We can focus on the bad parts of dialysis, and there are LOTS of them for any modality you choose, or you can focus on the life you still have because of it. I'm grateful for the medical advances that have made dialysis possible. Imagine if we were stricken with ESRD before they days of dialysis? None of us would be here to complain.
It's true that no one can understand exactly what we go through unless they've been there themselves. Many dialysis patients don't share their struggles with the people closest to them and I suspect the OP's husband might not exactly share all his thoughts and struggles with his wife. Most of us don't want our families to worry or fuss over us so we save our rants and gripes for a place like this where we can safely say what's on our minds without scaring our families.
I don't think this lady meant to come off as rude or critical. Her suggestions were valid. If your doctor isn't spending enough time with you, speak up. You have to advocate for yourself when you are seriously ill because no one else is going to do it.
I had one doctor who filled in at my clinic that I really disliked. She didn't spend but about 5 seconds with me, and would launch into questioning me about why I needed pain medication when I'd ask for a refill of the same medication (same dosage for the last 3 years) I have been on forever. She made me feel as though I were a drug seeker. I complained to my nurses about her and asked that they not schedule me on any clinic day when she was there. Apparently other patients complained as well because she's no longer working at the clinic.
Doctors are paid well, whether they work at dialysis centers or hospitals or in private practice. It's a fact of life. However, being paid well doesn't mean they are negligent or are trying to pad their bank accounts by keeping us sick. There are corrupt people in every business, but making our doctors our enemies is not a good strategy when we are already dealing with such an overwhelming illness. If you have a bad doctor or a corrupt doctor or a dialysis center you don't trust, please, seek another doctor or clinic. You do not have to suffer through bad care. Advocate for yourself as much as you can. The OP was right in that Medicare and Medicaid do not reimburse at rates as high as most people think. They do reimburse well, compared to what most of us make, but when you consider that their reimbursement covers supplies used for treatment and even certain bundled medications some of us take the amount left for salaries for nurses and doctors is much less than it appears. Do they make good money? Yep, they do. That doesn't make them criminal or conspirators in some grand scheme to keep everyone sick and on dialysis.
Positive thinking has its place but it doesn't take away the very real struggle or the reality of what this disease does to our bodies. It's okay to be angry. It's okay to be sad and frustrated. We wouldn't be "normal" if we weren't sometimes discouraged and pissed off. We got a raw deal here and it sucks. There's no great treatment option for us yet, but there are scientists and doctors out there who are still working on it. I hope they figure out something soon that will give us all some hope of life without dialysis or even transplant.
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Why are we all getting our panties in a twist over a post from 2006?
Personal Information removed.
kitkatz,Admin
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Seriously i was burst into laughter when i heard someone said "i love dialysis"this is absolutely rediculous bullshit.tell u what.i was living in Wales in the past 7 years and i came down with kidney disease there.i was so fecking scared so i search by a chinese website and been contact with a herblist.what he told me is kidney failure is just a piece of cake for him to solve down as long as u came to my hospital.and stupid me pack my bag fly to china.then what happened to me was there is a fraud of 100k chinese RMB trap waiting for me.in that case.i became a oversensitive person.so that taught me is dont trust a doc so easily.