I Hate Dialysis Message Board

Dialysis Discussion => Dialysis: Spouses and Caregivers => Topic started by: BrenH on June 12, 2015, 11:25:59 PM

Title: :stressed;
Post by: BrenH on June 12, 2015, 11:25:59 PM
 I am new....I don't know where to begin...I am so scared and stressed about all this info that my hubby and I are getting about his pending dialysis and transplant.
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: Michael Murphy on June 13, 2015, 06:58:04 AM
 Being stressed in the beginning is par for this course.  You are starting a trip into the unknown.  I believe every one on this journey starts stressed, scared, and  lost in a medical Forrest. I found the fear was far worse than the reality.  I would have two pieces of advise, one learn as much as possible by visiting sites you are going for treatments,  do not go for the first time the day of treatmtnt.  My first day of dialysis was a horror story not because of the treatment but because of the sheer terror of the unknown.  Two if there is any possibility of going on dialysis have a fistula installed.  Better to have and not need then to need and not have.  PD is not excluded by having a fistula but if hemo happens fistulas allow such nice things like showers and swimming in lakes.
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: Bambino_Bear on June 14, 2015, 04:48:56 PM
I understand the stress.  I understand the feeling of helplessness.  I understand just being pissed off that this happened to your husband.  Here is the very first thread I posted here.  Maybe it will help you,

http://ihatedialysis.com/forum/index.php?topic=29602.0

I can tell you that it does get better and less scary.  You will both settle into a routine.  My husband does PD and it has been awesome.  The best advice I can give you is to learn as much as you can.  Be your husband's advocate and cheerleader.  If you ever need to vent please feel free to send me a private message.  We are all here to share and help one another on this journey.

 :grouphug;

~Nikki~
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: Vt Big Rig on June 15, 2015, 05:22:56 AM
After three days I expect you are still "stressed". All I can offer is after 8 weeks we are settling into a routine that while amazingly time consuming, is still getting"routine". Having this disease is scary in itself, but the process of feeling better is no longer frightening. And the only reason it took this long is I have had several issues with my fistula.

I hope you feel better soon. Ask, ask, ask any question you can think of. People on here will help!!
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: Bambino_Bear on June 21, 2015, 03:49:44 PM
Hi Bren.  I hope you and your husband are easing into dialysis.  If you ever need to vent or talk I pop on at least once a day,

Take care of yourself.

~Nikki~
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: Hootie on June 22, 2015, 06:52:54 AM
BrenH,

Your feelings are the same that each of us have gone through at the beginning of dialysis. My wife is a retired nurse and I am the caregiver who was afraid of needles, blood etc. and six plus months later we have settled into home hemo very well. In beginning we had issues with the immature fistula and  needle sticking to get a good flash. The first time I stuck her in the training setting I was a little nervous. However, the nurse was very supportive and we got through it.

Being apprehensive happens to all of us who have gone through this process. As Michael said above, you will learn and grow while settling into a routine of who does what and supporting each other.  Dialysis has brought my wife and I closer together. Attitude is everything in this journey.

We are on home hero and love the flexibility of scheduling our time. The NxStage hotline has the best contact center support line I have ever seen. I was in the telecommunications  industry selling the technology before I retired. Also, the DaVita nurse is the best!

You will do fine...relax and learn the ropes....Evaluate all the options for dialysis and make the best decision for both of you. :bandance;
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: PrimeTimer on June 22, 2015, 11:50:42 PM
BrenH,

Your feelings are the same that each of us have gone through at the beginning of dialysis. My wife is a retired nurse and I am the caregiver who was afraid of needles, blood etc. and six plus months later we have settled into home hemo very well. In beginning we had issues with the immature fistula and  needle sticking to get a good flash. The first time I stuck her in the training setting I was a little nervous. However, the nurse was very supportive and we got through it.

Being apprehensive happens to all of us who have gone through this process. As Michael said above, you will learn and grow while settling into a routine of who does what and supporting each other.  Dialysis has brought my wife and I closer together. Attitude is everything in this journey.

We are on home hero and love the flexibility of scheduling our time. The NxStage hotline has the best contact center support line I have ever seen. I was in the telecommunications  industry selling the technology before I retired. Also, the DaVita nurse is the best!

You will do fine...relax and learn the ropes....Evaluate all the options for dialysis and make the best decision for both of you. :bandance;

As a carepartner, even after nearly two years of having it (home hemo) become routine, I am still stressed. Your words "Attitude is everything in this journey" keep running thru my mind tho. Hope they stick! Amazing what a few words can do. Uplifted me, thanks. 

A short drive in the car with your favorite songs blaring is also a great stress-buster. Did that the other day and it almost felt intoxicating. I need to get out more often.  :embarassed:
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: PrimeTimer on June 27, 2015, 12:07:04 AM
Just a few hours to myself does wonders. Helps break the chain of stress. Wish I still had a motorcycle or was in shape to go skydiving again. *sigh* Guess listening to the car stereo will have to do.
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: kristina on June 27, 2015, 01:29:35 AM
I am new....I don't know where to begin...I am so scared and stressed about all this info that my hubby and I are getting about his pending dialysis and transplant.
Hello BrenH,
I can understand your distress and your fellings and my husband and I went though the same scenario...
My husband (The Lovely One) was getting tested to assist me (I am on dialysis) with one of his kidneys
and whilst being checked-up for a transplant-opportunity, he was diagnosed with a tumour which he was operated on last week...
... We still can't quite believe it, but without him getting medically checked-up to assist me with one of his kidneys for a transplant,
his tumour would not have been diagnosed yet, as he had no symptoms at all
and as things are, his tumour was still "only" in the "developing-stages", which is extremely lucky  ...
I wish you and your husband all the good luck imaginable :grouphug;
and I do hope everything develops well for you both... and please keep in mind: medicine about dialysis and transplant has moved forward a lot
and doctors are extremely professional about all this these days.... :grouphug;
Best wishes to you both from Kristina.
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: familyfirst on June 29, 2015, 07:31:30 AM
I am new....I don't know where to begin...I am so scared and stressed about all this info that my hubby and I are getting about his pending dialysis and transplant.

Hi,
I hope things are settling a little for you, and everyone on this site can be a massive help in different ways (either they are receiving dialysis or are the other half/carer) it can be scary at times and difficult but as others have said I found the best way was to ask questions and try to support your hubby as much as possible, which I am sure you are. I was surprised just how bad my other half felt for a while after starting as I thought it was going to make him feel better - which it does eventually but tiredness and sickness became his life for a while. Whilst you are doing all you can for your hubby, please do not forget about you...........I did and then had a meltdown (which was not a pretty sight) stay strong, accept all the help you can even if it is just someone offering to cook your tea, take your ironing etc as you cant do it all yourself.

Take care and please let us know you are doing ok and best wishes to your hubby xxxxx
Title: Re: :stressed;
Post by: PrimeTimer on September 16, 2015, 09:45:04 PM
Did my first Pureflow control unit "swap out" today. I'll just say that I am glad I called Nxstage tech support for help. Then I primed a new Pak only to discover a leak at the orange conductivity sensor connection. To make matters worse, it was my own fault (I didn't have it screwed on straight). A leak is bad enough but then to not have anyone to blame for it, well... Was a long day and it wasn't until I sat down to watch the presidential debate tonite that I realized I hadn't even had a cup of coffee today. Wow. Just wow.  :o