I Hate Dialysis Message Board
Off-Topic => Off-Topic: Talk about anything you want. => Topic started by: pamster42000 on September 28, 2009, 03:13:17 PM
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Ok guys I have a situation that I am not sure I can handle myself. A young girl at work, age 17 was talking with me today and right out of the blue she stated she was feeling depressed and talked about dying. She is a very intelligent person but seems to have a bad family life, she has a boyfriend who doesn't treat her well and states she is lonely.
At one time she asked if she could come live with me. It seems she looks up to me.
I'm not sure which direction to go. Thought about discussing this matter with our Director of Nursing. She seems to be an understanding person. Should this be the route I take or do you have other suggestions???
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Sounds like you're between a rock and a hard place. If you actually give her suggestions and she takes them, her parents can probably sue you for custodial interference as she is still a minor. You may be better off talking with the DON. This is a real toughie.
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I would try to encourage her to seek help from a doctor or a therapist/ counsellor to assess her for clinical depression. She may need someone she can establish trust with to discuss the issues affecting her and/or she might benefit from meds. I would take her statement about dying at face value and treat it very seriously. I would tell her that many people, including teenagers, often experience these feelings and that she is too important, too young, to die and that you believe that the world needs her in it. You could offer to go with her to a first appointment (but not in the room with her, only outside as moral support, even if she insists) if she can't get there on her own but most crucially you should remain her mature, caring friend...not her counsellor or her surrogate mother or (in my personal opinion) her landlady. She needs a safe place to talk about the things that distress her and some help to make plans that will move her eventually towards the kind of life and living situation she wants for herself in the future.
If she starts talking more about suicide and you are her only confidante you may need to take her to an ER for her safety.
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I believe if she is under 18, you might have to contact whatever child protective services you have in your state if she has talked to you about suicide. Peleroja is right.. tread carefully since she is a minor.
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I decided to talk with our DON. Apparently she knows about some of the stress this young girl is going through. She (DON)offered today to her that she would be with her if and when she broke up her boyfriend and even her husband would come , if she wanted. ( I think we have a really great DON )The problem right now is that her boyfriend is continuously belittling her, saying she is nothing without him and she has the stress of applying for scholarships to go to college. She doesn't get support at home because her parents even belittle her, which is really sad. She has a really bright future ahead of her....hopefully she will be able to see that future for herself.
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The young girl thanked me for going to the DON and discussing her situation. She said she wasn't mad and that she (DON) helped her.
Actually I wouldn't of cared if she would of gotten mad at me. If she would have tried suicide and I hadn't told anybody...that would of been alot of guilt to live with.
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You did the right thing and should feel good about helping her the best way you knew how.
I hope that girl pulls through. I have an 18 year old daughter and a 20 year old son and if they ever needed it, I hope someone like you would be there to reach out to them.