I Hate Dialysis Message Board
Introduction => Introduce Yourself => Topic started by: worrydoll on May 03, 2009, 06:24:05 PM
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Hi everyone. Being new and not computer literate, I hope I'm doing this right and following the rules.
I am a caregiver. My dad has been a diabetic since 1976. In 1998 he had a triple bypass leaving him with MRSA. Soon after his surgery, he had a wound on his foot and over the next 5 years had partial amputations of all the toes and part of the foot. His last surgery was in March of 2003. He recovered within three weeks with no complications. Unfortunately, my mother was diagnosed with cancer and we realized that my dad was well so he could take care of my mom thru her death. It was a family effort and we spent alot of time together talking. He always thought he would die first; actually we all thought the same because he wasn't well for so long. After mom's passing he enjoyed traveling and good health. Then it started again in late 2006 early 2007. As it ended up, on April 25, 2008 he became a below the knee amputee. In order to do the surgery, they had to dialize him for 3 hours prior to the surgery then for two days after the surgery. It was temporary and he seemed to be okay. He had been in and out of the hospital and rehabs until July when he was admitted and then was told the had to start dialysis again. He received it four days in a row and then went onto the 3 days a week schedule. I see him failing every day. As it turns out, I am the oldest of three children and the only girl. He counts on me to do things the way my mom did. I try very hard but feel like I'm failing the test. I'm the only one he can talk to about dying and he has told me when he's tired of doing this he will tell me. I stay strong for him but it's very difficult after watching the pain my mom went through during the dying process. I don't want him to go thru it also. I promised though that whatever his decision, I would stand by him. I would keep him at home and do whatever he needs. My youngest brother built in-laws quarters on his home for my parents so he lives there with my dad. He's not ready for this again. My 21 year old son has been living with my dad in the same living quarters for the past 3 months so he's not alone and it makes him more comfortable. Well, this is my story and I look forward to learning from everyone. I need to know how it feels and the real statistics. I also need the truth about how bad things are. Or if it is all "normal" given this situation. I will be learning so that I can better care for my dad and help him with what lies ahead.
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:welcomesign; :cuddle;
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You are a wonderful daughter and you've come to the right place to find answers, friends, assistance, etc. I hope your Father is able to hang in there for a very, very long time. But when he's ready to stop, it's nice that he has you to go to. Welcome! We all look forward to hearing more from you. :cuddle;
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:welcomesign; worrydoll. I too am a caregiver to my husband. I understand what you are going through and there are many others here. Bless you for taking care of your Dad and we are a wonderful group for information and support. that was a great introduction and we look forward to hearing more from you. Please take sometime for yourself. :cuddle;
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Dear Worrydoll,
What you are doing takes great love and commitment. You have my admiration and support.
Please post often and vent, cry, or simply visit with us here. When you have questions, please ask. You have come to a strong, compassionate, supportive community.
Aleta
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:welcomesign; Happy you found us
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:welcomesign; Your Dad is lucky indeed to have such a caring daughter and I'm glad you're now a member of this group.
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Welcome worrydoll, good to have you aboard.
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Welcome Worrydoll to IHD. You are a wonderful daughter. To ease your mind, dying of renal disease is a very easy process. If your father chose to quit dialysis the toxins would build up to the point where he would go to sleep and not wake up. Not the suffering that cancer brings.
Just enjoy your time left with him and stand by his wishes.
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:waving;
As I am, you'll be so glad you joined IHD.
Take the time to read up on a few threads.
And as I am learning, please take time for
yourself.
deborah